I've been meaning to write in my diary since Sunday night (its now Wednesday night), just staring at this silly screen trying to find the time to compose my thoughts. And if you've read many of my other diary entries, i usually have quite a few thoughts on a few different subjects at any given time. This week has been no different.

First, a great burden was lifted Sunday as my Software Development group finally got our game installed and over with. Its been 13 weeks of hard work and stress and now we're finally done. I was almost ready to cry Sunday night, not because it was over, but how it ended. We all worked so hard, but when it all came down to it, we hadn't produce quite what we had wanted. After a failed install on Saturday morning, we worked another 35 hours non-stop (and I really mean that) to perfect and fix up our game only to have almost everything rolled back. I hadn't really done much in those 35 hours because it was beyond my skills, but it was sad to see the work of the rest of team get thrown away. We're still proud of what we produced and the AI that Jesse created is by far the best within our class, and quite possibly ever for this game. When pitting the AIs against each other, our AI is undefeated. Visually our game may not be the best or the most striking, but overall its something we're all proud of and the AI is just tremendous. If for nothing else, this AI will be remembered for years to come (we'll get our name on a plaque).

Now with my softdev project done, its time to turn my attention to the other projects I have. Unfortunately there isn't much time left to get these things done. I have another group project for my database class. I feel bad because with my softdev project, i haven't been able to contribute much to my database team. I also have to find a project to do for my Productions/Operations Management class. The project itself should be pretty simple, its only a matter of finding something to do it on. This is the second time i've taken this class, because without this project, I cannot pass the class. I don't want to be here another year because of this dumb class. I wish i had more time.

I wish I had more time for a lot of things though. After my Sunday brunch with Rachel, I realized how little time there was that I would be able to spend any time with her. I usually only see her once a week and many times it really is the highlight of my week. Now with graduation approaching, she's heading back to New Jersey and I have no idea where I'll end up. I guess I knew I'd have to say goodbye eventually, but the time I've spent with her this semester has really meant a lot to me and its going to be a lot harder now than I ever imagined. I wish I had more time. I've left here once before and was glad to be gone, but now I've meet some people who mean so much and I don't want to lose them. My friends, though scarce, mean so much to me. Even though I'll probably be going back to Dallas after graduation, I don't have any good friends left there like my friends here. There's no one there that I can talk to like Rachel, or hang out/live with like Aaron.

I'm scared of the loneliness I fear is coming my way.